Tuesday, December 16, 2008

How to confuse netflix



So I don't know if you to have the wonderment that IS Netflix, that handy company that mails you movies in order on your "queue", with nary a late fee, keep the movies as long as you want... the whole thing's genius really. [Side note: have you ever checked out the word "queue"?? Doesn't it seem like there's too many "u's" and "e's" in there? Like it could be pronounced que-you....But I digress] Anyway I just got a good chuckle when I read our "recommended titles" from the company. That's where they take the movies you've watched and make future viewing suggestions on things you might like based on that. Well I'm sure they must think we are insane, bi-polar, or crazy, because their suggestions look like somebody threw darts at a board to pick out what we might like next.
Well hubby loves movies, especially horror movies. I can't even watch one scary episode of Little House on the Prairie, so I can never watch all the stuff he gets. The only thing I ever rent from there are for the kids. All preschool type shows, music, Baby Einstein, etc. So when looking through our queue today I guffawed out loud. These were the suggestions: Dawn of the Dead, Tinkerbell, Halloween, Psycho, Fisher Price Little People, and The Legend of Hikimo #3, Sword of the Seven Blades. (That last one there is a throwback to when my stepson use to rent a zillion Japanese anime movies every summer). I love it. Horror, babies, anime...I think we've thoroughly confused the netflix master computer. Throw in an "Abba's greatest hits", Pokemon and the Orange Island II (cause they couldn't cover it all in Orange Island I?), and "Xanadu" and you've got yourself a swirling vortex of a movie mind jumble.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Tainted Ariel


Ok so I haven't blogged in a while... since Summer to be exact. In my defense the wee ones around me have been keeping me running in circles for the most part. I'm always on the verge of putting two coherent thoughts together when it's interrupted by a cry, a poop, a scream. Finally tonight I got them all asleep at the same time (a planet aligning event for sure) and thought hey, in lieu of a shower, paying bills, or catching up on some shows, I'm gonna blog darn it. So be happy, and let me tell you the story of the "Tainted Ariel".

So we got these juice things at the store, they are part sippie cup, part juice box, and part greatest invention ever. Mostly because they are reusable, almost completely unleakable (sure it's a word), 98% indestructible, and are topped with kid-friendly characters from Disney and PBS for starters. Plus, what kid alive doesn't want to suck juice right out of the skull of their favorite childhood hero? They are ingenious really. The character at the top spins freely, so that little hands can't take off the lid, thus preventing the spilling 8 ounces of juice all over your recently steamed-cleaned carpet. Once you drink the original apple juice you can refill it with water, sugar-free juice. Just pop um in the dishwasher and they're good as new! They last for a long time too, we have some over a year and they're still going strong. The kids love them. They are narrow, providing easy grip for little hands, AND they slip into overstuffed diaper bags nicely.

So you're probably saying to yourself... what's the bad 2% you speak of? Well kids have probably found the one loop hole in this otherwise unleakable (I'll say it again) product. They have found if you shake it REALLY hard, juice will come flying out of the top in a nice spray. This albeit fun and festive practice has been nipped in the bud, so to speak, so we're good there. This was a mommy thing that in one fell swoop, ruined one of these juice sippies forever.
Well poor Ariel was being washed in the top rack when somewhere in the initial rinse cycle, plummeted to the bottom of the dishwasher and landed (I think) on the heating element. Whilst unloading I found her in the bottom of the brink and twisted her back up on her sippie pedestal and stashed her in the cupboard. The next day at lunch things were going great. One had Elmo, the other, Ariel. Suddenly there was a shriek from the table and Ariel was tossed quickly to the ground (Did it leak when it hit you ask? Nope, aren't they great?) Upon closer inspection the front of Princess Ariel was A-OK! But turning her around it was the back of her head, which I hadn't noticed before was melted into a black lump of goo. It looked like a demented mini beehive and it freaked my 4-year-old out. I tried to "reason" with them, showing that Ariel still worked just fine, but the damage had been done. They won't even look at her now, so I'm going to have to toss her, even though she's only a few months old (sniff). Here's her new song (singing dramatically): Down where they slip, down where they fall, down where their head melts into the wallll...... lumpy and wild, frightening the child, and leaving their world...
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